I am in Paris. Paris.
I am having the hardest time turning off. I am having the hardest time relaxing. This is the first time in my WHOLE life where I have traveled by myself, with no one or nothing to care for but myself, and without it being work or music related. It's a "just 'cause" trip. My dear friend, Kara Pecknold had decided she was going to spend close to a month in France, her first week being spent in Paris, and I jumped at the chance to go. It was on the calendar for months, "Going to Paris with Kara no if's and's or but's".
So, here I am, and I am having panic attacks, not sleeping well (of course, when I have ever slept well?) and have been shedding a lot of tears.
I know. I know. Rich people problems, right?
I wrote to Betsy, with whom I'm doing the Word for the Month project and told her that I thought the word "Rest" was what needed to be focused on this month. She responded with,
"I'm not surprised; rest is written all over the pages of my journals - both as a prayer and a reminder to self."
I think it's funny that I chose that word, knowing that I needed to focus on it, and then, when I get to a place where I can finally rest, I can't. And, neither can Kara because it seems that I've been snoring. That's not embarrassing at all.
On another note here's a bit from an email I sent to Zack yesterday that I wanted to share:
Kara and I were out till past midnite last night. We spent close to five hours at the Bar Hemingway in the Ritz Hotel. So amazing. Two women and a gentleman sat down at a little table near us and were talking and I thought I recognized one of the women. I leaned over to Kara and said, "I'm positive that she's an actress or something. Her face is so familiar."
Kara agreed that she definitely looked very familiar but that neither one of us could place exactly where she was from.
"Definitely not a famous famous person, but like smaller roles and TV movies and stuff.", Kara said.
"I'm going to go over there and ask."
"No! You'll embarrass me!"
"So, go to the bathroom or something and while you're gone I'll be the dumb American friend who embarrasses herself."
"No! Just wait till they get up to leave, then ask."
So that's what I did. They got up to leave and walked out and I almost didn't follow but it was bugging me so much! I HAD to know or I was going to think about it all night.
I ran after them and caught sight of them just as they were about to turn a corner down a long hallway.
"Excuse me!", and then a bit louder, "Excuse me!"
She turned around, her companions looking at me curiously.
"Hi there. Um. I know that this is awkward but...I'm really terrific at awkward actually."
The mystery woman laughed at that.
"So, yeah. I think you know that my friend and I were sitting at the table next to you?"
"Well, there is something about you that is so familiar and yet my friend and I couldn't place it exactly. Do you have a well known doppleganger? Or are you an actress and, because I have had a couple of drinks, I can't recall your name because I can't even recall MY name at the moment?"
She laughed again and said,
"Yes, I'm an actress. My name is Sela Ward." here she extended her hand. "What's yours?"
"Meghan. Meghan?" I was joking, "Yes, I'm positive it's Meghan."
We shook hands and I said it was nice to meet her and wished her a pleasant rest of the evening and walked back to the bar.
Kara was looking at me expectantly when I came back.
"AAAAH. OF COURSE."
Later on Kara went downstairs to use the bathroom and struck up a conversation with two English ladies that had also been sitting near us. They had been wondering about Sela as well and Kara told them how I had gone out on a limb to ask.
"Yeah, we were trying to place her but," and here Kara, as she was relaying the conversation back to me, laughed, "They said, yeah but how do you Google what someone looks like?"
“Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under the trees on a summer's day, listening to the murmur of water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time."